And, of course, when my always suspicious, old and battered military back pack slid through the x-rays, the official watching the screen shouted for bag check. A young Latino Lover came forth 

and looked through my bag, and soon fished out my Swiss army knife and my nail scissors. Somehow, I had completely managed to avoid considering the fact that these items are supposed to be in checked-in luggage, and NOT hand luggage (maybe because there, miraculously, hadn't been any trouble with it back in Amsterdam - perhaps because the more sympathetic (and considerably less suspicious of socks) female official had happened to take care of that part of my luggage).

Well, I would either have to abandon them, or go to some far-off store to buy envelopes and stamps to send them to myself by mail. But luckily, my poor little boyfriend was standing on the other side of the barriers, watching worriedly, and I was allowed to give them to him to take care of. When I approached him, another security official, watching the barriers, shouted "whow, whow!" and "no touching!" when he thought we were too close to each other ... As if someone as harmless and righteous as my little Sasha would ever even think of helping someone like me to smuggle something lethal onto a plane.

Well, it sure beats me how they can dare to still let passengers use real plastic forks and knives when lunching on the planes, instead of introducing toothpicks for cutlery. After all, plastic forks can be used as weapons. When poked into the eye of stewardesses, you can actually grope into their brains. With toothpicks this certainly could still be possible, but not quite as easy.